The Handshake
In a relationship business, you must genuinely build the relationship to get the business.
By Mike Tedesco
When I was 12, my brother John got me an after-school job selling newspaper subscriptions. Armed with nothing but our wits (and free umbrellas if you signed up), we hustled door to door and quickly became the newspaper’s top salesmen. In those four years, many a door was slammed in my face, but I learned how to approach strangers. I became quite good at it. These skills would later help me tremendously as a young loan officer, and I quickly became a top producer. I continued to develop this craft even as I began my own company.
The Value of Personal Connections
Over the last 13 years, I built Appraisal Nation from three men with two lenders into 120 employees with more than 1,300 lenders across America trusting us for their valuation needs. My entire growth strategy is focused on one core principal: This is a relationship business and to get the business, you must build the relationship. Getting from first encounter to client is a long process, but the first encounter is always the most important.
In the modern age of technology, true personal connection is becoming rare. I built my sales model on a different philosophy than most. I believe that if we are going to have a relationship business, we must actually meet our prospects and build from the very first interaction: the handshake.
For the last decade, I have reinvested a large percentage of our profits into face-to-face interactions by sponsoring and exhibiting at more than 50 lending conferences a year. In that time, I have personally attended more than 400 conferences and shook thousands of hands.
You may think meeting someone would be easy: Shake a hand, say hello and ask for their business. But, the process is a lot more complicated than it appears. The wrong first impression could mean never having the opportunity to earn someone’s business.
There is a lot that goes into meeting a new prospect. Preparation is key. Before you shake a hand, you need to be prepared both physically and mentally.
Hawaiian Shirt or Tie?
Being prepared physically sounds straightforward enough. You simply look and act professional. You should always know your venue, know the crowd that attends and know the location.
If I’m attending a retail banking conference in the Northeast, I wear a three-piece suit, sharp tie, cufflinks, stay collars, the works. If I’m at a broker show in Orlando, maybe my attire will be matching polo and slacks with shined shoes and a coordinating belt. I went to Credit Union conference in Honolulu a couple of years ago. I’d never done this conference before and was a little concerned, so I called the event director who advised that most people would be in Hawaiian shirts and flip flops because they incorporate a vacation into the show. I followed his advice and fit right in. The vendors in suits looked out of place. When you’re unsure, simply ask the event organizers about the general attire. And when you are unsure, always err on the side of caution. You can always take the tie off.
Another big part is grooming. Unfortunately, the number of people who come up to me smelling like last night’s outing is astonishing. A fresh haircut, good grooming (brushed teeth, clean nails, etc.) and properly pressed clothes will make you look and feel like you belong. Always carry mints or gum. You will be doing a lot of talking, and your breath will get stale. Remember, never turn down a mint. There is usually a reason it is being offered.
When possible, get a good night’s sleep. An average conference day for me can be 16 hours or more.
Know Your Company and Products
Being physically ready is only one part of being prepared. You have to be mentally ready as well. You would be surprised by the number of people I’ve met who have no place being where they are, whether in their position or at the conference. They are not equipped to answer questions, and they make their company look like a late-night basement startup that hired them from an online questionnaire.
Know your company and products intimately and have value to offer. If you do not have all three of these, do not attempt to sell your product. Once you have mastered your company and believe in it, you should be confident enough to go to a conference. Confidence is key. If you don’t believe in your product, or do not want to be at the conference, or don’t like talking to strangers, it will show.
Remember, you are the face of your company when you are traveling. What you do is a direct reflection of your company. This includes your appearance and behavior at airports, dinners and even clubs. Make a fool of yourself drinking too much and people will think your company is not responsible. If you look disheveled, unprofessional or ill-informed, a prospect will think your company is as well. Care about yourself and your company so you and the company are seen as a positive example.
Finding Your Target
The next lesson is to always have a target.
Before I ever go to a conference, I look over the attendee list and send our present clients short emails asking to meet up for a 15-minute check in. I then send emails to the top 10 lenders I want to do business with. These may not be the largest, but they are the 10 that I know that we will align well with.
I usually get three or four responses. Two will immediately say they’re “not interested.” That’s not a problem. I will follow up with them at the show because what they just did was start a dialogue, and I like dialogue! Another might say, “Please speak to so and so,” and I will. Then another will say, “I only have a few minutes at this specific time.” Set the meeting. That person has just become my target. Granted, I will visit nearly every exhibitor’s booth, spend some time at our own and shake perhaps hundreds of hands throughout the conference, but this one person is my mission. I want to get his company added to my pipeline.
Take the time to do some homework on your top prospects. This is where you use the internet to your advantage. Look for connection points. Research your target’s alma mater, find sports teams he or she likes, know the city he or she lives in, and be familiar with work history and children’s activities—whatever it takes. You are now an online stalker. If the information is public, you should view it. LinkedIn, Facebook and Google are great for this. Try to know the answers to questions before you ask them. A solid 15 minutes of research could make the difference between making a connection or a missed opportunity.
You are prepped and have a meeting set up. Now choose a quiet but inviting location. Hotel coffee shops can be great or even a quiet hallway nook at the venue may work. If you are meeting at your target’s trade show booth, make sure to stand to a side so that others can continue to operate, while keeping your target from interruptions.
Finally, always, always, be on time. When I was in the Air Force, we were taught 15 minutes early is on time and five minutes early is late. I may run behind on a lot of things but never when meeting a prospect for the first time.
Now, my favorite part. We look great, we’re prepared, we’ve arrived 15 minutes early and we can see the target is at their booth. Silence your phone—at this moment there is no one more important than your target. If your target is in a conversation, wait. Remember you have 15 minutes. Once the person, leaves approach with confidence. After all, why shouldn’t you? You look great, you know exactly what you’re talking about, you know tidbits about your prospect and you have something of value to offer.
Here are some tips for the conversation:
- Have a genuine smile on your face when you approach. Be happy to see them.
- Always look the person in the eye and continue to focus on them throughout the conversation. Do not stare at them the entire time, but remember they are what matters most at that moment.
- When you are introducing yourself is precisely when your hand should reach out for that handshake. Shake firmly twice, not like a fish and not like you just finished a workout on Venice Beach.
- If your target reaches in for a card, that would be a good time to exchange it. If not, wait until the end of your conversation to present it.
- When presenting your business card, do so with pride. Present it upright with your name and company facing your target as you deliver it.
- When receiving a business card, always take a moment to look at it in front of the person giving it to you. Read the person’s name and title before putting the card in your pocket. I sometimes do this out loud (softly on purpose) and nod my head affirmatively while reading it
- At the introduction, repeat the target’s name. Then remember to drop it into your conversation at least two or three more times. Every time you say your prospect’s name, make eye contact.
- Find a way to connect to establish rapport. Ask questions that bring you back to what you know outside the industry and find commonality. Try to find two things where you have common ground. For some people, this may be a little more difficult, but here is where your research will help.
- Don’t cross your arms, and avoid your pockets. It is OK to mimic your target, except for crossing arms. I find the most inviting pose to be hand over hand at my naval.
- Tie in a quick story of family and ask about your target’s family. Remember what your target tells you—if all goes well, you will need that information for the rest of your career.
- Be concise about why you wanted to meet.
- Listen. Ask open-ended questions about your target’s needs and don’t interrupt.
- Explain the value you provide and how you would like the opportunity to prove yourself.
- Be honest and always deliver on what you say.
- Now, follow up with another connection point and thank your target for their time.
- Set a follow-up meeting or phone call and put it on your calendar right there.
- If you haven’t given your target a card yet, now is the time to do so while saying that you look forward to following up.
My goal here is not to walk away with business. Relationships take time. My objective is to leave here with my target knowing Appraisal Nation’s position and value and that we can help. Always follow up. Everything you just did will be wasted if you don’t follow up diligently.
All of this said, it is especially important to be genuine. When I started Appraisal Nation, I tried for years to separate my work life from my home life. I discovered it was exhausting and really held me back from being successful. I am a family man, a sports fan and a traveling explorer who loves doing new things. I found we all have a lot more in common than we realize and that every morning we all put our pants on the same way. So just be you.
See you on the road.
